The Academy of Goose Defense Dozens of people every year are bitten by rampaging geese. Don’t be a victim! Protect yourself from these feathered bullies! Take my goose self-defense class today! Don’t let the creeps of the bird world ruin your next park outing. Be the hero of your next picnic by standing up to the geese or running away calmly. Take my class at the Academy of Goose Defense today!